i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
