We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
