Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
