Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize