dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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