She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
