i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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