That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Of course I have a pirate flag
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
