Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
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