He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
