The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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