i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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