we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
