he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
i think my cat just said my name.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
