You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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