Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
you made out with another girl for some wings
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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