dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
