You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
