New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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