I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
You're like the curious george of whores
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize