My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
