she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
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