Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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