doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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