if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
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