Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
