all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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