I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
He? As in you personified your dick?
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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