i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Randomize
