we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
