I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
