this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize