is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
false alarm, still single
Randomize
