His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Panties = found
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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