Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Randomize
