That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
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