I got chris browned last night
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
