i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
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