shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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