I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I just blew my weed a kiss
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
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