I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
My vagina is very pro this idea
Randomize
