hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
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