I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
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