The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
of course. lets lasso hookers.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
i think i just lost a toe
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize