just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I understand Curling. That high.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
