Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
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