Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Randomize
