My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
