where am i from again
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
