hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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