I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Randomize
